Getting Educated In Creativity

A teacher asked a little girl what she was drawing and the little girl said: "I'm drawing a picture of God." And the teacher said: "But no one knows what God looks like." And the little girl replied: "They will in a minute."


TED talks are great. Some mind-blowing. Others thought-provoking. But always inspiring.

This one from Sir Ken Robinson has been around for a while but I just watched it recently and really liked it. Please, enjoy.




One part I found interesting was when Robinson says, and I'm paraphrasing... "The extraordinary evidence and variety and range of creativity here has put us in the place where we have no idea what is going to happen, in terms of future, no idea."

And then today over at Alex Epstein's blog I watched this lecture by Jesse Schell about creativity and future possibilities in the gaming world and thought: Wow...could that be the future? And if so, where does conventional and traditional TV/movie storytelling fit into it all? What the hell should I be doing?

PC Games - E3 2010 - Guitar Hero 5

We may not quite know right now, but I betcha we will in a minute.

I'm On A Horse, Or Am I?

Great ad, but can you spot the CGI?

Watch this behind the scenes about the making of the commercial...you'll be surprised how little computer graphic imaging there actually was.




Which brings me to today's "Thing that makes you go hmmm..." Since so many of our movies, TV shows, advertisements, etc. now use liberal amounts of CGI relatively seamlessly, does it really matter if it was done live or 'in post' anymore?

Dreaming In Blog

So just had a dream, mostly made up of me searching a large city park for a children's baseball that was missing (by children's baseball I mean one that still had some weight, but was smaller and had a soft-ish exterior). Not sure if I found the ball or not, but at one point I went past an outdoor cafe and see Jim Henshaw sitting with some woman. What was strange was in my brain I said "Hey it's Jim!" but in my dream I ducked behind a tree and then tried to slip around the back of the establishment...but it didn't work, because there was a payphone there and Jim was somehow now talking on it and he waved at me and I was busted and so had to come over to him.

So Jim's on the phone trying to finish a call and this kinda creepy guy holding a small knife makes his way over to us and asks to use the phone and I say he's gotta wait until Jim's finished and then the creepy guy jabs the knife into his leg...and I'm like: "Shit man, what are you doing?!" and he's like: "I need help." And then I notice creepy guy has knife puncture holes in his arms and his chest and his neck and they're all trickling blood and so I tap Jim and gesture at creepy guy and Jim nods and finishes up his call and hangs up and I tell creepy guy to call for some assistance.

Anyway, I told you that dream to tell you this one. No, not really.

So Jim and I go back to his table in the cafe and the woman is gone and Jim proceeds to tell me about his phone call and how it was with a producer from the US or UK or somewhere who wanted to come shoot here in Canada but didn't understand how it was possible for him to get so much tax credit rebate money since his project was written by a foreigner and he wanted to bring a lot of his own crew and Jim said he explained to the producer that depending on the new Canada Media Fund guidelines when they're released the project could maybe get CMF money even with a foreign writer and might be able to cast some foreign star actors in the lead roles and still get Telefilm funding and the foreign producer was like: "That's insane!" and Jim was like: "I know!" and I was like shaking my head and all: "I know! Insane! Tell me about it!"

And then Jim said the foreign producer asked how we all make a living over here and Jim said he wasn't sure anymore....with line producer fees mostly. And then we sat there for a moment sipping mint juleps, and then I asked: "So what are you gonna do?" And Jim replied: "I'm not sure, but it'll make a great blog post!" And I was like: "It will! Because listening to you retell the phone conversation sounded exactly like another one of our industry is fucked up blog posts!" And Jim nodded. We both seemed very pleased with ourselves, and then we high-fived each other or something. And then I woke up.

The end.

"One Two Three Forty Eight!!!"

If I were Mr. Burns for a day, a day like today, it might go a little something like this.




"Excellent..."

Tiger Tiger, Burning Bright

What immortal hand or eye.
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?


I'm sure Tiger Woods watched Caddyshack a lot while growing up. Do you think he took away any words of wisdom from the film (and I don't mean "receiving total consciousness...")?




Nah. Probably not.


Friday fun, because it makes me smile.

Fetch Me A Coffee Every Time I Clap My Hands...Run!

Things are slow-ish. Spirits are low-ish. Not to mention it's February.

Time for some Charlie Brooker.




Ahhh. That's better.

Totally Eclipse My Heart...Literally

"Slo mo dove.
Creepy doll, a window, and what looks like a bathrobe.
Then a dim-lit shot of dangling bulbs."

This video has been around for a while but it still cracks me up...Friday fun fun Fun.



Because it makes me smile.

F*ck. Me. Gently. Please?

Acting. Auditioning. So hard. So so so hard.

I wrote a post a few years ago entitled But Would You F*ck Him? using a scene from James L Brooks' film I'll Do Anything to relate some of the harsh realities of the casting process...but Ken Levine takes the same topic and hits it out of the park in a recent entry entitled, not coincidentally, Guys Are Not Going To Want To F**k Her.

For example:

Your agent submits your name. The casting director may not think you’re right or not be a fan and you’re dead. Assuming you’re over that hurdle you’re invited in to read. There usually are a hundred or more actors reading for every role. Great odds, huh? In these initial sessions you’re usually reading for a committee – the writer/producers, the pod producers, a couple of studio representatives. All you need is one of them to not like you and you’re toast. And by “not like” that could mean “too tall”, “good but we’ve seen him in things”, “he was my waiter last week at the Daily Grill and was terrible”, and “guys are not going to want to fuck her”.

It gets better. Or worse, depending on your prospective.

You can hit it out of the park and still not get the part. The network president may be partial to a name on his golden list. He may have no ability to judge talent. He may not want to fuck you.

By some miracle he likes you. But there’s a hang-up. He still wants a bigger name. So you hold your breath while the producers make an eleventh hour plea to Paula Marshall. She passes. They settle for … I mean “cast” you.

You’re in, right? Not so fast.

During the week of production there are network table readings and runthroughs. You could get fired at any one of them. And it’s not necessarily your fault. The material could be awful, the director gave you bad direction, they never really wanted you in the first place.

Yeow. The line that resonates the most with me is..."They settle for - I mean *cast* you." With just about every writing or directing job I've gotten I've felt like they *settled* for me. Maybe we creative types always feel that way. Or maybe 'they' always do settle. Who knows.

Anyway go read all of Mr. Levine's post HERE. It's a classic.

Jesus Is Not A Zombie

I shouldn't have to tell you that.

Find below an excerpt from a VERY LONG transcript from the keynote speech that buddy Hart Hanson gave at a 'Future of Story' conference in Edmonton last weekend. And there's some of that, the future of story stuff...but mostly it's Hart just being funny and talking about creating and running Bones or TV writers vs. Artists or writing for mass audiences and so on and so forth. Check it out...very entertaining stuff.

HART: I thought what I’d do is show you a couple things, a couple values, that we put up on the screen in Bones, and discuss, and sort of point out how one deals with the values and hopes to gain a mass audience without completely and utterly writing Sunday School tripe. My apologies to all Sunday School teachers here. Heather, could we run the next…

Clip:
Booth: Voodoo, who’s going to believe that stuff?
Brennan: It’s a religion, no crazier than… what are you?
Booth: Catholic.
Brennan: They believe in the same saints you do, and prayer. What they call spells, you call miracles. They have priests.
Booth: We don’t make zombies.
Brennan: Jesus rose from the dead after three days.
Booth: Jesus is not a zombie. I shouldn’t have to tell you that.


HART: Of all the lines I’ve gotten on American television, “Jesus is not a zombie.” I’m so proud. I was amazed that it went by Standards & Practices.

The States, that culture is a very, very religious culture these days. It’s… a significant amount of it is very fundamentalist. My lead character is an atheist. The female character is a scientist and an atheist. The value that we were talking about there is faith. Not to get too personal, but I tend more toward her than him. I’m a little cranky about religion these days, since about 9/11.

So I put a lot of what I think into Brennan’s mouth. But in the end, because Bones is mass entertainment, the spiritual, religious man gets the last word. Okay, it’s a little subversive to say that Jesus is a zombie. But you know what, Jesus was a zombie – three days […] and then he went and scared people!

We get a lot of mail about Brennan’s offensive statements about God, the pope… I don’t know if anyone watches the show a lot… I make a lot of fun of the pope’s hat, and I treasure every one of them. The funny thing to me is that the same letters will say, “Thank goodness Booth was there to set you straight.” And it’s like, I wrote that, too! Apparently, I’m writing the atheist, but Jesus is writing Booth.


Jesus is writing Booth....nice!


Check out Hart's entire talkey speechey thing plus the q&a HERE.

Mirror Mirror On The Wall....

...which scene is scariest of them all?




I predict the next big slasher/horror movie hit will be one that plays with mirror mirror expectation and convention and then turns it on its head. Or someone will just make a scary flick about haunted mirrors. Oh right...someone already has.

A Travesty Of A Mockery Of A Sham

I move for a mistrial!

Friday funny.



Because it makes me smile.

We're The King Of The World!

Local news story opens with:

The Canadian filmmakers behind two of this season's most buzzed about films landed Oscar nominations in Los Angeles on Tuesday morning, with James Cameron's 3-D blockbuster Avatar and Jason Reitman's downsizing comedy-drama Up in the Air among nominees for best picture. Kapuskasing, Ont.-born Cameron and Montreal-born Reitman are among the 10 contenders for the top Oscar category.

Does the fact that they've spent most of their lives in Los Angeles and made their films there not matter? Are we so lame a film industry or country even that we get jazzed about this and think where they were born has had something to do with these 'Canadian' filmmakers success?

Oh we do? Oh. Okay. Nevermind.

Can't. Wait.

I never thought Breaking Bad had a chance when I first heard the premise....but I was hooked right from the opening scene of the pilot episode.




"There are going to be some things...things that you'll come to learn about me in the next few days. I just want you to know that no matter how it may look, I only had you in my heart. Goodbye."

Nope. Hello.

March 2010. Bring it.

iPeeWee

I know McGrath won't find this very "funny", but Pee Wee Herman showing off Apple's new iPad is still pretty Friday Funny.

Pee-wee Gets An iPad! from Pee-wee Herman

(If the embed doesn't work, click link at bottom of player)


Because it makes me smile.

Leon Take Your Break At Two

Writers, directors, producers...sure, we all have it hard. But acting? Acting is hard!




"I had questions to ask, and research to do,
Like why does Leon take a break and why is it at 2?"

Fun-neeeeeee!



H/T Adam Barken

Ouch

Anyone who knows me knows I've been a Minnesota Vikings fan my entire life.



And I can't blame Favre because even though he should've never thrown that pass that was picked off in the last 30 seconds of regulation, it was his stellar play all season that had the Vikes in the NFC Championship game to begin with.

Still, they really woulda coulda shoulda won. I ache a little right now.

Continue Stocking!

I realize I'm years behind the curve here, but I've been doing some research into web-based drama/comedy series and recently discovered Chad Vader: Day Shift Manager. Most web series I've watched I really don't get. As in, I don't understand why they were considered appropriate for the internets since they just seem like conventional longer form drama/comedy done on the cheap and then sliced up into 5-10 minutes chunks (with hopes of getting noticed and receiving a deal to make as a conventional broadcast TV series I'm guessing? But if that's their ultimate goal, then what does that say about the web being the future?) I know The Guild has been held up as a success story, but take Acting School Academy or the adventure series Riese for example...they're decent though with kinda stretched out storylines yet good production values, but to what end? Why weren't they produced first as a conventional TV series pilot or low budget feature film? Who paid for them? Were they sponsored, and if so how come I'm not seeing the advertising prominently displayed with some of them? In this 'free' format, how are they making back their costs?

Seriously, don't get me started on the "how do we monetize?" question (the same unanswered question I've been hearing for ten years while also hearing TV is dead and new media is the future!). One article I read about how to create a successful web-based TV series actually had the quote: "We are not defining "successful" with "turning a profit."

But Chad Vader I got. Premise self explanatory. Episodes short and self-contained. Production values or lack thereof irrelevant. Therefore relatively inexpensive. The kids dig it which = lots of return traffic and DVD sales. It's fun. Friday fun!




Because it makes me smile.

Smaerd Gnibbud Pil

The other day McGrath posted this wicked entry HERE from Shorecrest High in the latest round of lip dub warz. Great stuff. But for me at least, the behind the scenes "how" they did it video is just as entertaining.




Remember, these are high school students.

Take note, directing wannabe's...the bar just got higher.

Preservationist?

Sure. That too.

I've already written my love letter to Martin Scorcese before on this blog HERE, but still wanted to post the tribute to him during last nights Golden Globe awards. It was sincere, touching, even moving...with a wicked montage to boot (though concluding with the yet to be released trailer for Shutter Island was a serious fail, and in some ways reduced a brilliant career down to just a half-assed plug).

If you missed it, enjoy.




He's clean. Clean like his conscience.

I've Got ADD (Assistant Director Diagrams)

Two circles may intersect in two imaginary points, a single degenerate point, or two distinct points. The combined area of sets A and B is called the union of A and B, denoted by A ∪ B. The area in both A and B, where the two sets overlap, is called the intersection of A and B, denoted by A ∩ B. If the circles intersect in two points, the line connecting their two points of intersection is called the radical line.

In the following example, the 'radical line' would be the Assistant Director.




A Venn-like diagram to help explain film production. I like it. A lot.



Diagram courtesy On-set With An Indie Film Junkie

Weeds Not Worth It

Last fall, Family Guy's Seth MacFarlane did up some youtube clips taking on shows he was up against in the Best Comedy Emmy category...like The Office. What I didn't realize at the time was that he also gave the same treatment to 30 Rock, and Entourage, and How I Met Your Mother.

And Weeds.



Friday funny!

It takes balls to put this kinda thing out there. Kinda like Jimmy Kimmel on Leno last night.



Balls.

Because it makes me smile.

Everybody Needs A Copilot

This will only mean anything if you've seen Up In The Air, which I liked a lot, but man oh man....depressing. George Clooney plays hatchet man Ryan Bingham who flies around the country firing people for bosses that don't have the balls to do it themselves. But he also gives motivational speaking engagements...we're talking major Tony Robbins shit, as he puts it. And the film opens with Bingham in the middle of one of these presentations, standing at a lectern in front of dozens of attentive listeners. And while I was watching the film, and this scene specifically, I wondered: What if Up In The Air’s Ryan Bingham was the TV series writer’s answer to Robert McKee?

It might go something like this.


How much does your draft weigh?

Imagine for a second you’re carrying your story in a backpack...I want you to feel the straps on your shoulders...you feel them?

Now I want you to pack it with all the tricks you have in your writer’s toolkit. Start with the little things. The premise and the overview. The set up and the exposition. Inciting incident and complication. Feel the weight as it adds up. Now start adding the larger stuff. Your beats, plot points, rising action, resolution, your climax. That backpack should be getting pretty heavy at this point – go bigger. Your B-story, your act breaks, the cat you want to save...stuff it all in. Your theme...get it in there. Your structure – whether you have five act television pilot or a two part to-be-continued, I want you to stuff it into that backpack.

Now try to write.

Kinda hard, isn’t it? This is what we series TV writers do to ourselves on a daily basis. We weigh ourselves down with so many story possibilities we get blocked and can’t move. And make no mistake – in TV, moving your fingers fast on the keyboard is living.

Now I’m going to set your backpack on fire. What do you want to take out of it? Plot? Plots are for people who can’t remember how to feel. Drink some glingko and let the plot burn. In fact, let everything burn and imagine waking up the next morning with nothing.

It’s kind of exhilarating isn’t it? That’s how I approach every episode rewrite.

Okay, this is where it gets a little difficult, but stay with me. You have the same story, but a new backpack...and this time, I want you to fill it with characters. Start with bit parts, walk on’s, friends of friends and passersby, and work your way to the people your main character trusts with their most intimate secrets. First, the secondary characters – relatives, best friends, co-workers, colleagues, and relatives...get them all into that backpack. And finally your main character’s husband or wife or boyfriend or girlfriend. Get them in there too.

Don’t worry. I’m not going to ask you to light it on fire.

Feel the weight of that bag. Make no mistake, your main characters’ relationships are the heaviest components of your TV screenplay. Feel the straps cutting into your shoulders. All those negotiations and arguments and dilemmas and secrets. But all that conflict equals drama. And drama equals story.

Now set that bag down. You don’t need to carry all that weight. But your episodic screenplay does. And if you have to rewrite a draft fast, let your characters show you the way.

Some animals were meant to carry each other. To live symbiotically over a lifetime. Star-crossed lovers. Monogamous swans. We are not one of those animals. The slower we move, the faster we die. We are not swans. We’re sharks.

We’re TV writers.





EDIT: Having just read the ugly arbitration backstory between Jason Reitman and original screenwriter Sheldon Turner regarding this screenplay, I now wonder how the above speech may have sounded if it was given by Turner. And the backstory certainly gives new meaning to the 'needing a copilot' line

I'd Rather See Open Mic With Stalin

Yes, another Hitler video with subtitles...but it's about the ongoing Jay Leno / Conan O'Brien NBC late night talk show debacle, and it's pretty damn funny.




I really do wish Jay would just go away.

And after you've laughed at that, go watch Letterman give his two cents on this nasty bit of show bid-ness HERE and HERE.


You gotta love Dave.

The Prophecy > Legion

Legion tells of God's loss of faith in humanity, so he sends his legion of angels to wipe out the human race for the second time. Mankind's only hope lies in a group of misfits holed up in a diner in the desert who are aided by the archangel Michael.



"When I was a little girl, my mother spoke of a prophecy..."


Actually, voice-over actress woman, I'm thinking your mother spoke of a wicked 1995 movie entitled The Prophecy from which 'Legion' seems to have borrowed a lot, rather blatantly in fact.



"Humans... and how I love you talking monkeys for this... know more about war and treachery of the spirit than any angel."

Rent "The Prophecy".

A Jungle Is No Place For A Cellist

The first mockumentary? Most people reference This Is Spinal Tap, but I'm thinking it was Woody Allen's Take The Money And Run - the life and times of Virgil Starkwell, inept bank robber. Of course there was the classic "I have a gub" holdup gone wrong...but the school marching band cello player ranks a close second, and is certainly Friday Fun worthy.




Because it makes me smile.

Se7en + 3nthusiasm = Funny

It's like telling a joke, really. Take the set up of existing characters and circumstance from the movie Se7en. Then throw in a little twist at the end of the scene. The result? Dramatic tension magically transforms into a very funny punchline. It's wrong in oh so many ways...but I guffawed.





H/T Daniel Redenbach

Sons Of A Certain Age Can Spell Some Super Anarchy

Two great TV series make their Canadian debut tonight on Super Channel.



First up is the Season 2 premiere of FX's Sons of Anarchy. If you haven't seen it yet and need some Sopranos-like tee-vee crack, this gritty drama set in the biker world of southern Cali is must see, seriously. Check out a preview HERE. Season One was awesome and by all accounts Season Two is even better (yes, the second season has already aired in the U.S., but hey, what you gonna do). And furthermore, creator/showrunner Kurt Sutter has a wicked blog HERE.



And immediately following SOA is the series premiere of TNT's Men Of A Certain Age. Starring Ray Romano, Scott Bakula and Andre Braugher, it takes a funny, and sometimes poignant, look at three friends hit hard by middle-age. Yes this series has also started airing down south, but the reviews have been great, and I strongly recommend you check it out.

Check them both out...in Canada, only on Super Channel.

2010: The Year We Make...TV?

The television biz in Canada has just gots to start loosening up and happening again next year, right? New TV policy changes perhaps? Value for signal gets turfed and we see a return to pre-1999 Cancon rules? Too optimistic ya think? Probably.


I know I slacked off on the blog this year, whatever...it's become an ebb and flow kind of thing now I've decided. But along with Twitter (follow me at wcdixon), Uninflected Images remains a great place to make contact...not to mention share and sound off and sneer and smile with other like minds.

Thanks to McGrath, Henshaw, Walton, Epstein, Diane, Weinman, and all the other Canadian Writermafia types (see sidebar) for yet another year of entertaining and inspiring and provoking as you all continue to blaze the TV In Canada blogging/social networking trail.


And as for 2010 - what's going to happen? Something wonderful?




I wouldn't hold my breath - I always thought 2001: A Space Odyssey was kinda overrated and 2010: The Year We Make Contact a seriously dull turd. But what do I know, really...and hey, I'm always happy to be pleasantly surprised. So surprise me 2010.


Happy New Year.

Merry Holidays

Have a wonderful and safe holiday everyone...and now will hand the floor over to two of my industry blogging partners in crime with links to their wonderful Christmas Eve posts.

Denis McGrath hits a home run HERE with "A Visit From von Finckenstein", a hilarious riff on T'was The Night Before Christmas....and Jim Henshaw delivers some seasonal music cheer with "Christmas Concert 2009" at his place HERE.



Enjoy!

Yulelog III - The Director's Commentary

"As a filmmaker I've always been fascinated by how music influences a fertile imagination...."



I love this kinda stuff. Happy Holidays everyone.


H/T Myron Hyrak

Listless

I am not big on 'Best Of...' (year, decade, century) lists, but was encouraged to jot down my top TV shows of the 2000's (00's?). It's not a best of list as much as a recognition of certain programs/series I watched consistently. Some were even "appointment television", though in this day and age of DVD box sets and the internets, appointment TV is a term that will soon be parked in the What's that? section, beside the 'rotary dial phone' and 'VHS tape'.

So...on with the shows.


Arrested Development - the Bluth's
30 Rock - I like to go to there
Curb Your Enthusiasm - What? What?!
The Office UK - mock doc rock
South Park - ample parking day or night
Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Whedon
Veronica Mars - Thomas
House - Laurie
Six Feet Under - death entertaining
Breaking Bad - meth entertaining
Lost - flashbacks and flash forwards
The Sopranos - The Chosen One
Law & Order or Law & Order: Criminal Intent - anytime comfort food


Jekyll and Life On Mars...brilliant but limited. Dexter burned bright but faded too fast for me. Firefly was great but didn't last long enough to count in my opinion. Really enjoy Mad Men, but not blinded by the love. I haven't yet got through all of Deadwood, The Shield, Battlestar Galactica, Friday Night Lights, or The Wire - all are excellent but I can't in good faith include though they certainly deserve mention. And if live NFL football, Leafs hockey, and PGA golf can be considered shows or programs...well, I watched a lot of that too. I'd also add The Daily Show and The Colbert Report but this didn't turn out to be that kind of list.

Doh! I said it: List!

Like Screwing Up Mashed Potatoes

I watched this last week and found it immensely entertaining. But then I watched it again today and decided it really is worth sharing. A review of Star Wars: The Phantom Menace - a loonnnnng review...but stick with it. It's very funny and kinda surreal yet perceptive and educational even - it should be required viewing for every Film School student.

Part One is here:




Parts 2 - 7 can be found in the related videos to the above clip. Enjoy.


H/T Trevor Cunningham

Not, The *Naughty* List

Even though it looks bad...the beard, the packages, flying without a passport...this is one suspect Jack Bauer can't break with his 'interrogation' techniques.





H/T Jill Sampson

I'm Not Kidding About How Good I've Been

Still my favourite Xmas TV special of all time (though last years A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift Of All now runs a close second), Pee Wee Herman's list for Santa is some holiday season Friday Fun.



Because it makes me smile.

Quintuple Lavender

"We'll fix it in post." -- the five most expensive words EVER!

This Hitler clip has been used a zillion times, but you gotta love it being used as the setting for the final production meeting of the TV series Cra$h & Burn's first season.




And if you play in the Canadian TV series sandbox, there's the added bonus of recognizing some of the names involved with the show. Big tip of hat to writers J. May and J. Beasley and editors G. Tucker and T. Seaborn...bang on good.

Also should mention clip was found on a new Facebook Group 'Overheard On Set'. Check it out. Funny!

Viral. Anti-Viral.

Nice compilation of ads or videos HERE that took the internets by storm this past year. Most accomplished what they set out to do, like Volkswagon's 'Fun Theory' piano stairs...




...but some were of the epic fail variety.




I'm glad this campaign wasn't 'my idea'. Lucky for Microsoft they're already popular.

So Go And Hug A Tree

Cartman sings Pa-pa-pa-Pokerface...Friday Fun perfection.



(full length version HERE)


Because it makes me smile.

More Elves, Please?

Another semester done. Another room full of screenwriting students out the door with a half hour draft under their arm and their spirit not broken too badly I hope. But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, or so I've been told. And as Neil Gaiman says more eloquently than I ever could with this advice for aspiring writers...it's just putting one word after another.



You're welcome.


H/T Trevor Cunningham

One Gift To Rule Us All

It's -34. Times are tough. Work is slow. The current CRTC hearing is just another series of repetitive presentations seemingly making no forward progress. Depressing much?! Take all that into consideration and even a Michael Bay ad can be a pick-me-up. Michael Bay + Victoria's Secret + explosions, that is.



A thousand short films could've been made with the budget of this 90 second spot...how's that for a fantasy!

Let's Make Apple Juice And Fax It To Each Other

Beyond trippy. Seriously. And a wee bit NSFW. But fun. Friday Fun.





Because it makes me smile.

Big Electric Kitty Music

I actually wanted to post Big Electric Cat (which I used as the soundtrack for my first student film way back when - seriously, listen to it...wicked), but embedding was disabled by request...so I'm Down, as also performed by Adrian Belew.

See belew.



Crazy busy week continues...but into home stretch.

Everybody Gots To Go...Sometime

Okay, it's not from Ya Ya's, but it still rocks.



Busy week. Back shortly.

Really? Oh. I See.

I always thought this song was called "Cloudbursting".



Still like it though. The video too. And what's in a title, anyway.

This Is Not A Challenge, This Is An Opportunity

When you make your living as a creative freelancer, you're constantly getting asked to work on spec, as in: "Could you do this for us and if we get any traction there will be some work/money in it for you down the road." The future employment, that's always the carrot dangled in front of your nose.

And when you're starting out, you do need to take on some of those freebies. Because you need to get noticed. Because you need to show what you've got. Because you need to start building professional relationships. But the problem so many of us face is that even after doing it successfully for years, decades even, you'll still get the "We've got no money, but could you whip something up?" calls.

The following are two Friday Fun examples of what you wish you could say instead of "Sure thing. I'll get right on it." They're from the worlds of advertising and graphic design, but they absolutely apply to screenwriting or making TV.

The first is a hilarious e-mail exchange between David Thorne and a prospective client. It's from Thorne's website 27b/6 .

An excerpt:

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.10pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Anyone else would be able to see the opportunity I am presenting but not you. You have to be a f*cking smart arse about it. All I was asking for was a logo and a few pie charts which would have taken you a few f*cking hours.


From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.25pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon

Actually, you were asking me to design a logotype which would have taken me a few hours and fifteen years experience. For free. With pie charts. Usually when people don't ask me to design them a logo, pie charts or website, I, in return, do not ask them to paint my apartment, drive me to the airport, represent me in court or whatever it is they do for a living. Unfortunately though, as your business model consists entirely of "Facebook is cool, I am going to make a website just like that", this non exchange of free services has no foundation as you offer nothing of which I wont ask for.

Regards, David.


Go read the rest of the transcript HERE, with pie charts and everything. Simply brilliant.



The other example is in the same vein and pretty self explanatory. And pretty funny.




Because they make me smile.


H/T Matt MacLennan H/T Jay Robertson

There Are Two Things I Know Are Going To Sell. The Sexy, And The Awful

Seriously seriously NSFW, but Louis CK thinks about the future...funniest thing I've seen in ages.



"I kinda don't think my career is going to keep going up. I think it's going to start declining."


H/T Rob Sheridan

NEMESIS!

Still jammed up, but here's some short film awesomesauce from Norway.



Good visual storytelling trumps any language barriers. And like Bonnie Tyler, we all need a hero.

Keep An Eye Out For Ya, Stingray!

I'm jammed up with writing and story editing and teaching, so only have time to put up a clip that should give hope to emerging filmmakers everywhere. As in, if this got made, maybe your 'avenging your sisters death at hands of crazed martial arts rapist' movie will get made someday too.



Undefeatable!

We Need To Make The Logo Bigger, But Feel Smaller

Friday Fun has to be this hilarious look at an advertising agency pitch session starring: The Account Exec; The Clients; and The Creatives.




Because it makes me smile.

H/T Sean Embury

Film Director Gets Schooled In TV

The CRTC hearings are melting my brain, so it was a nice diversion to read this entry from director Justin Lin, mostly known for directing features (The Fast And The Furious: Tokyo Drift, Fast & Furious), relating his first foray into directing television on the comedy series Community.

Going in, I had some preconceptions of shooting in television. I had heard that TV moves much faster than feature productions. And since I came from the indie world, I thought I’d be used to it. But the reality is that TV is like shooting an indie film on steroids but with a studio and network right there with you. Forget Jenny Craig, if you want to really lose weight go shoot a TV show. Not only is time money, you better go in knowing what you want because things will shift and if you don’t know the core of what you’re trying to achieve, you’re in trouble because you’ll have no time to figure it out.

Before we go on I want to make sure I don’t overstate the position of the episodic director. In feature land the director is like Magic Johnson (and for you kids Lebron James). But in TV land the episodic director is like Michael Cooper (or Anderson Varejao). The creator and the writers are what drive the engine. The director of the pilot establishes a visual style and tone for the show. The actors are responsible for crafting and honing their characters as they grow from episode to episode. The job of the episodic director is to come in, learn as fast as possible the essence of various aspects of the show and deliver them within the confines of the specific episode without hopefully missing a beat.

Lin then goes onto say something very interesting.

The other thing I learned is that television is the one lone standing medium where one has to earn their way. This might sound obvious but we do live in an era now where anyone can pick up a camera and proclaim themselves a “filmmaker”. They can’t do that in TV.

In feature world as long as one can get their hands on funding or equipment they can set out to tell a story. There’s no way a person can come in and be a writer or create a show without some body of work to back them up. A feature film production can average two to three pages (about two to three screen minutes) a day but in TV it’s doubled most of the time. In feature world filmmakers spend usually at least a year to complete two hours of film but in TV they have to produce eleven hours of quality content for a half hour show in about 25 weeks. There is independent cinema but there’s no such thing as independent television.

In Canadian TV try triple the page count a day!

Speaking from experience, I couldn't agree more. It was a serious 'holy crap' slap in the face moment moving from independent movie/one-off production to the careening almost out of control train that is series TV...first as a director then as a writer/producer. The 'reality' vs. the preconception was almost overwhelming. Note I say 'almost' - you either embrace it or avoid it. I embraced it.

But when I teach film and TV production or screenwriting, I always feel like the students leave class never really grasping much less appreciating how massive an undertaking it is to write, produce, shoot, edit, and get to air a season of a TV series. The crew and cast may be the same size, but the fact that production goes on and on for the better part of a year while delivering the equivalent of ten or twenty quality feature films, it's near impossible to execute and deliver without an experienced leader and qualified team who have battled through the gauntlet time and time again. Not to negate the work involved in producing a feature film, but Lin speaks the truth...getting a feature made doesn't ever really prepare you for the making of a TV series.

Though there's many in the feature world that would like you to believe otherwise.

Read the rest of Lin's post HERE.

Local TV: What Are We Saving Exactly...Again?

First, go read Uncle Jim's A Tale of Two Business Models...it's relevant to the following repost, and well worth reading. I'll wait.

A reprint, from May earlier this year, but in light of the CRTC hearings going on this week in Gatineau it seemed apropos to post again. And my story shouldn't be seen as support for the cablers or a direct attack on CTV...it's just a specific example against the argument being put forth by all OTA broadcasters now. And yes, this was written before the cabler/broadcaster battle devolved into an all out media war...but after watching a couple of days of the hearings, fee for carriage (oops, I mean value for signal) to save local TV and regional TV stations remains at the center of the storm.



On Saturday afternoon I stopped by the open house held at the CTV station in Regina which was part of the network's recent nationwide campaign to Help Save Local Television...a campaign that has seen more advertisements air on your TV set than for the promotion of any Canadian homegrown program that I can think of.

Below are the key talking points highlighted on the front page of the pamphlet they were distributing to the (unsuspecting) public:

Local television impacts everyone

Now is the time to hold the cable and satellite companies accountable

Current regulations in Canada allow cable and satellite companies to take CTV programming without paying for it. These companies then charge you, the consumer, for the programming they take from us for free. The satellite and cable companies that deliver the TV signal to your house are reaping huge profits at the direct expense of local Canadian TV stations.

Now YOUR local television station is in financial trouble, and we need YOUR help!

Local television stations should receive compensation from cable and satellite companies that carry our local programming.

First let it be said that I don't have a lot of love for the Shaw's, Rogers, and other cable and satellite companies across Canada (you can watch Shaw Cable's Ken Stein debate the issue with CTV's Jacqueline Milczarek HERE), but so much of the information in this CTV pamphlet is just dead wrong.

1) Cable and satellite companies don't take CTV programming without paying for it. Like Global and CBC, CTV is an Over The Air (OTA) network, which means you can receive it in your home with an antennae. For free. Cable, however, delivers a cleaner, clearer signal, and thus CTV chooses to have its signal/programming delivered via this mechanism because it reaches more eyeballs in a better quality form = higher ad revenue. Furthermore, because their signals are available freely over the air as per a priority carriage mandate means the OTA channels must be made available to and distributed by all cable/satellite subscribers.

2) Cable and satellite companies don't charge you, the consumer, for CTV's programming...they charge you for the pipe - the delivery mechanism for the TV signal. They built and implemented a television signal delivery system (cable or satellite) that they can provide you, the consumer, if you choose to subscribe, and that's what they are charging you for (thus, they are called 'cable providers').

3)Finally, your 'local' television station isn't in trouble, the CTV (or all OTA broadcasters for that matter) business model is in trouble. Like Global, CTV doesn't really offer much in the way of programming that consumers couldn't get if we could just choose U.S. networks on their own. It seemed only fitting this 'Save Local TV' open house took place the same time as Canadian network programmers landed in L.A. to spend spend spend on American shows for the new fall season.


There are four 'local CTV stations' in Saskatchewan, same as Alberta...whereas there is only one, CTV Winnipeg, in Manitoba and one, CTV British Columbia (essentially Vancouver) in B.C..


Regina's CTV station, CKCK, really only produces local newcasts. And between the four Saskatchewan stations they produce two news magazine-style series: the Prairie Farm Report and Farmgate, and Indigenous Circle, a weekly program dealing with Aboriginal issues at home and beyond.

How do I know this? Because I asked some of the helpful and smiling CKCK employees only too eager to Save Local TV: "What local programs are we trying to save?"

A woman mentioned the three above programs, though went on to add: "But we're just an affiliate - we just put on what the network says we have to put on. But there is the news!" I asked if the carriage fee (oops, value for signal) requested by the campaign would ensure the production of more 'local' programming. I got a lot of blank stares.

Then I asked when the Regina station was going to go HD, because even though I can view CKCK in analog on channel 6 on my cable channel dial (or channel 2 over the air), I tend to only watch my HD channels from my cable package...and in my cable package those signals come from either CTV Toronto(channel 509) or CTV British Columbia(channel 519) (...unless of course the U.S. scheduling of said program has messed with CTV's schedule and I receive the Lost or Law And Order simsub transmission from one of CTV's other 'A' Channel eastern affiliates like Barrie or Windsor or London or from Victoria in the west, complete with local commercials!).

So I asked: would my 50 cent per month carriage fee that the network is requesting of the CRTC going to support/save Regina's local station? Or Vancouver or Toronto or Windsor's local station? I again received blank stares, and some humming and hawing that they weren't sure about the HD going local but were sure that at least some of the money would come back to the Regina station.

Then I mentioned that most of the information in the pamphlets they were handing out was flat out wrong: that cable providers provide a delivery mechanism to consumers willing to pay for it...that's why they are called cable providers. And that's what we are paying for, the cable pipe, not the programming that CTV either produces or buys from the U.S. to simultaneously substitute their ads into.

I got some rather surprised looks and a lot of looking around. Then someone then asked if I was going to sign the petition (I said no). Then a hand was gently placed on my elbow and I swear someone whispered: "Look, we don't want any trouble here."

Trouble? For just asking a few questions? Anyway, I was getting some pretty cold looks so I edged my way out the door and beat a hasty retreat.


That's when I noticed yet another chartered bus arriving with another load of what appeared to be mostly senior citizens. Starstruck, they disembarked and tottered into the station gushing about how much they loved their local station. Not surprisingly, they didn't bat an eye when pressed to sign the petition. Sigh.

And I missed the balloon in the sky, Uncle Jim...but I did see them putting it back in the truck.



It was all smiles and hugs but frankly, smelled a little...funky, best exemplified IN THIS CLIP of CTV's Vice President, Corporate Affairs Paul Sparkes at the open house in Toronto answering questions from a CP24 reporter...lots of: "Oh let's not get bogged down by the details and clog our heads up with facts and truisms and regulatory lingo...isn't local TV great!"


Look, we know Toronto and Vancouver and Montreal will probably always have their own local news and some locally produced programs, but for the rest of us spread across the great land of ours, 'local TV' doesn't really exist anymore.

I get my U.S. signals from Detroit and/or Seattle. I get my Global signal primarily from Toronto and Vancouver, same for my CTV signal. CBC's feed also originates primarily from Toronto, but at least they adjust the times to fit the time zones so every show on the network comes on at the same time in each region. But I can't say the same for the U.S. feeds or Global and CTV feeds. In my neck of the woods, prime time begins either at 6pm (8pm EST) or 9pm (8pm PST).

Now it doesn't seem that long ago when our local CTV would produce daily talk shows and documentary series and even kids/drama programs. But today, other than the odd informational or newsmagazine show and a couple of newscasts a day I don't really have a local station anymore, and haven't for some time. And I would say the same goes for most of the other outlying regions in Canada.

So, the wrongness of the CTV campaign aside, whose 'local TV' would we be saving exactly?

I Love The Smell Of CPAC In The Morning...

DING! And there's the bell!

According to today's Toronto Star, "Today CRTC hearings are a battlefield again. It's the private broadcasters versus the cable and satellite providers. You, the consumer, are somewhere in the middle."

Read the rest of Iain Marlow's article HERE for the results of the weigh in.

And then at 8:30 am EST head over to CPAC and watch Round One HERE.

The hearing lasts ten days. There should be plenty of quick jabs followed by some low blows, but at end of the fight it's doubtful anyone will be smelling victory.


DAY ONE recap by Globe and Mail HERE and Toronto Star HERE.


And I will add that though not surprising, it was rather annoying to hear today the problems and issues facing the broadcasters/cablers and our industry while primarily using examples from Toronto and the Greater Toronto area...oh, and Ottawa and Brandon, briefly. This after a half a year national campaign to support 'local television'.

Pox News...And A Video Hankering To Go Viral

So, hearings begin Monday in Gatineau that will see Canadian broadcasters, cable companies, and a lot of those "creative" guilds parade in front of the CRTC to state their position and voice an opinion on fee-for-carriage/save-local-tv/stop-tv-tax for the third, yes the third, time.

I'm really not sure what else can be said that hasn't been said ad nauseam already about the topic...though an insider did tell me that the BDU's or the Broadcasters have been known to pull a new proposal out of their pants at a hearing. I'm holding my breath. Seriously!

But if you feel like you need a primer that goes beyond the battling ads/PSA's/Influencing Heritage Minutes? (WTF would you call them?) that you can't avoid on your TV sets because they air ALL. THE. TIME., then watch this decent debate of the issues that was on TV Ontario last night HERE (A Pox On Both Their Houses) or podcast HERE....and then check out this video put together by the Writers Guild of Canada.



And with that as the last word, for now, we'll see you Monday.

When Your Life Is No Longer Your Own

Movie trailers used to be cool. Most would tease you with a taste, trying to entice you to come see what the heck that was going to be. Nowadays because market research apparently informed studios that showing viewers everything gets a better turnout, most trailers leave little to the imagination. As in, mass audiences prefer knowing what they're in for even if the trailer shows parts of the last reel, and thus today we tend to get a synopsis of a movie instead.

So in tribute to the then and now, Friday Fun is a few of my favourite 'just a taste' trailers...






And the original theatrical trailer for ALIEN here.

"I'm screaming but no one can hear me!!!!!"


And a few of my favourite "show everything including some of the plot but it still looks so awesome I need to see it' trailers:







Whoa.


Because they make me smile.

How Does It Make You Feel?

Maybe you're just starting out, or maybe you've been doing it for years, but you work in television...Canadian television primarily, and you read this (Via TV Eh):

Canada's television shows - news and non-fiction programs excluded - are terrible compared to their American counterparts. And it's not only in one genre: we fail in every category imaginable. In response to American comedies like 'The Office' and '30 Rock', we come back with 'Little Mosque on the Prairie'. For their action dramas 'NCIS' and 'Prison Break', we come up with 'Flashpoint'. Animated shows like 'Family Guy' and 'South Park' are met with 'Bob & Doug' and 'Chilly Beach'. They created 'Saturday Night Live', we came up with 'The Royal Canadian Air Farce'. 'The Daily Show'? 'The Rick Mercer Report'. Seriously, we couldn't even get 'Sesame Street' right - we had to create a monster named 'Sesame Park'.

It's not that every Canadian show is completely awful, but in relative terms the best we can do is create shows that are equal to a reasonably bad American one. If you don't believe me, let's look at the main offenders. One of the most popular Canadian shows of the past decade was 'Corner Gas', a sitcom set in rural Alberta based on unfunny banter and Canadian stereotypes - kind of like those episodes of 'Malcolm in the Middle' where the oldest brother was living in Alaska. It ran for six seasons and averaged about one million viewers per episode.

Another popular show, 'Heartland', is like watching an episode of 'The O.C.' but with less characters, less jokes, less drama, and if everything they did had to do with farm animals. Again set in rural Alberta, 'Heartland' focuses on a teenage girl with a loosely explained ability to communicate well with horses. You might be thinking that only shows set in rural Canada aren't that funny or interesting, but that wouldn't be fair. Last year marked the end of several failed urban Canadian shows including 'Instant Star' and 'Robson Arms', which might make you sad if you ever heard of them. It's true: much of Canadian television is so bad that you forget it was ever on the air.

Okay, Corner Gas was actually set in rural Saskatchewan and SCTV does still make me laugh, but that's not really the point...the author, Kyle Carpenter writing for the McGill Tribune, doesn't stop there. And he concludes by saying: "So far, I've not been able to find one Canadian TV show that I am proud to say is from my country."

Really.

Just one young guy's opinion, sure...but I hear the same sentiment all the time from the 20 year-old's I teach each semester at the University. In fact, most struggle to name a Canadian TV series, much less one they like or are proud of. So again, you work in Canadian TV, and you go read the rest of the piece HERE, and then tell me...how does it feel?

Alrighty Then....

...moving on.

Dan! DAN!!

Vintage Friday Fun is Steve Coogan as Alan Patridge (Coogan in 24 Hour Party People is still one of my all-time fav roles)...this Dan! bit clearly inspired this Alan! bit.




Because it makes me smile.


H/T Mark Farrell

Then They Put Me In A Truck...

This Canal+ commercial has been zipping around the internets for a few weeks now, but it's still pretty awesome.




... :p at first i was all srs faced but then i loled :3 ...


Never underestimate the power of a great story.

Directing TV...By The Numb3rs

Other than the pilot (I always try to view every pilot when they air), I'd never really watched the TV series Numb3rs...until about a month ago. I was flipping and an episode was just starting and I found myself pausing and then found myself watching and then still watching and then it was over. And it wasn't bad. Sure, I didn't get the major buzz 'must watch again' feeling I got when I first watched The Sopranos or Six Feet Under or Lost or Dexter or Breaking Bad...but I enjoyed it for what it was (in a CBS Friday night prime time mathematician detective procedural kinda way), and that's since prompted me to watch a few more episodes.

Anyhow this all led me to cross paths with series writer and co-creator Cheryl Heuton on Twitter, who then pointed me toward one of the series' regular directors Stephen Gyllenhaal also on Twitter, which led me to a series of behind the scenes 'making of' videos produced by Mr. Gyllenhaal that he's been POSTING HERE on his blog.

They're just snippets, moving snapshots if you will, of the process of prepping and directing a one hour of network television, but well worth watching.

A taste:


Creating the Show




The Script




Rehearsing A Scene




Producing the Episode



"My job is to keep you on schedule."


Very true. Because at the end of the day yes it is about the show and making a good episode, but it's also about the numb3rs.


Lots more to watch HERE, go check them out.

Jump Right In...It's *Your* Story

Sure it's kinda spoofy and a little over the top, but this post from TV writer/producer Richard Manning still captures the essence of excitement/pain blend that a freelance screenwriter experiences when trying to successfully navigate a television series' Writer's Room.

Mary Sue’s successful pitch: “Griff and Angela [the series leads] must mind-link with K’Vax [their sentient, female, wisecracking spaceship] after a radioactive nebula erases K’Vax’s memories.”

There was more to her pitch – such as the mind-link forcing the aloof Griff and Angela to confront their true feelings about one another – but Mary Sue never got that far; Sam had interrupted. “Good hook, but amnesia’s soft. Needs more jeopardy. Hey! What if the nebula turns K’Vax evil? And she tries to kill everybody on board! So it’s dangerous for Griff and Angela to go into her mind; they might never come out. Terrific pitch! Sold!”

Mary Sue was ecstatic. “Great! I’ll write up an outline –”

“We don’t do outlines. We – me and the writing staff – break all our stories in the room. Once we get the structure down, you go off and write the script. Come in Tuesday at nine. Bring in a beat sheet. Not an outline, just the big moves. Some rough act breaks. Keep it simple. One page, tops, just to get things started.”

And so it begins…

9:00 am Tuesday. A punctual Mary Sue happily looks around her first Writers’ Room. Cheap, mismatched “executive” chairs surround a coffee-stained table strewn with old magazines, food wrappers, a Slinky, a broken water pistol, various Rubik’s-type puzzles, and other toys. The walls are a crazy quilt of actors’ headshots, set blueprints, costume design sketches, test photos of alien prosthetics… and three large whiteboards.

Two are covered with multicolored scrawls, circles, arrows, renumbering, and crossouts – the story beats for Episodes 5 and 6, in impenetrable shorthand: “5. BRIDGE: G + A expo. K ng 10 min no Froonium. H/L payoff? AB: J zapped.” The third is frighteningly blank – a naked canvas awaiting a plot.

I've been there. It's confusing, terrifying, intimidating, and exhilarating all at the same time.

Read THE ENTIRE POST HERE.